Such a nice day out today iam sitting outside with my daughter Emma. Iam playing on my computer and she is playing on her fake one.She wants to be just like her mom and that makes me so proud.I just hope she feels the same way after all this is over with.Iam going try try and spend as much time with my kids now before it gets worse or i do treatments.And its realy hard to do considering i can't stay awake.I guess right now its better to sleep so i don't have to be awake to think about all this.My god its even hard to say the C word.Starting tomorrow i got to start making all my doctors appt and getting test done.Even thinking about making the appts is hard i guess there isnt anything easy about this except all the support i have been getting is just amazing.But i still feel alone no matter how much i have.well iam going to try and update as much as i can so i can look back after this journey is over because this will make me a stronger person.
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